Stress and Coping

Stress occurs when coping with a stressor taxes or exceeds our coping resources. Coping involves thoughts and behaviour to manage the problem. Alternatives to the word “coping” include: battle with, carry on, confront, contend, deal, endure, face, get by, grapple, handle, live with, manage, struggle, suffer, survive, tangle, weather, and wrestle. Stressors can be personalContinue reading “Stress and Coping”

Assertiveness: ACTIVE responding to complaints, criticism and put-downs

Receiving Complaints or Criticism Often the unassertive person indiscriminately accepts complaints / criticism and apologizes for events even when s/he cannot be held accountable for these. On the other hand, people who become highly aroused and livid when they receive complaints are behaving aggressively, not assertively. Method 1. Distinguish whether the criticism is valid, invalidContinue reading “Assertiveness: ACTIVE responding to complaints, criticism and put-downs”

Assertiveness: PASSIVE responding to complaints, criticism and put-downs

FOGGING (from Smith, 1989, pp. 104-112) This is a way of dealing with manipulative criticism from other people. It follows these principles: We do NOT: deny any criticism, get defensive, or counter attack with criticism of our own. In other words, we respond to this criticism as if we are a fog bank. A fogContinue reading “Assertiveness: PASSIVE responding to complaints, criticism and put-downs”

Assertiveness: Our Rights

The underlying philosophy of assertiveness training is based on the premise that we are all equal and that we all possess the same basic rights. Many people seem to have forgotten, or have never been told, that these rights exist. The goal of assertiveness is to stand up for your rights without violating the rightsContinue reading “Assertiveness: Our Rights”

Assertiveness: Introduction

What is assertiveness? The word assertiveness is used to describe a certain pattern of behaviour or a style of communicating with others. It is a way of behaving which means we are communicating our feelings, thoughts, and beliefs in an open, honest manner without violating the rights of other people. It is an alternative toContinue reading “Assertiveness: Introduction”

Clinically Standardized Meditation

The term meditation is most often applied to any state of prolonged focus or reflection upon a word, subject or object. There are many variations of meditation. Each calls for the repetitive use of a word or a thought (a mantra). Dr Patricia Carrington (1978) developed Clinically Standardized Meditation (CSM). It was created by modifyingContinue reading “Clinically Standardized Meditation”

Writing Therapy

Since the start of my work in clinical psychology close to 40 years ago, colleagues and I have viewed writing as a powerful therapeutic method. We found that it helped people cope more effectively with psychological trauma of various severity levels. Typically we asked the person to write their Life Story. Interestingly, writers found thisContinue reading “Writing Therapy”

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